Week 12 of the Simplify Your Life challenge; thoughts on Dealing with Change
I can’t say I deal with change well. While I feel I am spontaneous, creative and adventurous in my mind, I am actually a creature of habit who loves routine and finding my groove. New ideas and desires constantly flow but change requires decisions and there is my downfall.
Sometimes I overthink things until it drives me crazy and I can’t deal with it anymore, other times I can make snap decisions and have to change things this instant! You know- I want to re-arrange furniture, create a new art piece and have a new cabinet delivered the same day! On a daily basis, I think my challenges are making the decision and then maintaining the change. The ‘actual’ change is quite easy for me.
One of the biggest changes in my life was becoming a mum. The decision to have children was a no-brainer. Something we both wanted and valued highly. We had planned the laid back approach- get married, go off the pill and let nature take it’s course. But of course… after a year, no pregnancy. So we decided it was time to actively ‘try’ for this baby- to step it up and help nature along. This involved doctor’s appointments, charting, temperature taking, dietary changes and lots of early nights! Every month was a rollercoaster of emotions, and I started to question my body, my being… all the while wanting this change more than anything in the world.
And then. One morning. Those two little pink lines changed everything. I did the test twice to be sure. The feeling was exhilaration and pure fear. I had wanted this for so long and now we had achieved it. Woo hoo! We were having a baby! … then… Oh My God (insert shaking wonderment and fear) we are actually really doing this!!!
And it was the best choice we ever made. Mostly, I am proud of the change motherhood has made in me. Some changes expected, others have surprised me. There are fleeting moments when I get caught up in the craziness and think wow- I’ve changed- who is this person? It’s easy to blame them for making me this way and to think “I didn’t used to be like this”. But in learning to take time out and re-connect with myself, I am finally taking responsibility for me. My children haven’t inflicted change on me. We are on this journey and growing together but I am responsible for the person I am, for my thoughts and my choices. I never lose sight of the bigger picture, and remembering those two little pink lines makes my heart swell with pride for our three little miracles and the choices we’ve made.
Change is inevitable. Even my grandmother who defines ‘old-fashioned’ and has had the same wardrobe for more than 30 years- still accepts some change. Having young children means change is a constant for us right now. Sometimes change is a deliberate choice and action, other times change is thrust upon us unwillingly. Yet we not only manage to cope with change, but we also grow and find positive inspiration from change.
We can make choices, set goals and plan action to get things rolling- but I truly believe that ultimately, change unfolds in perfect time. When it is meant to be, it will be. Change can be exciting, joyful, scary, sad or thrilling- but if you trust it, then positive things will come.
How do you feel about change?